I must play catch up again as I didnt write about last weekend. Friday night went to a concert (one of my fav bands right now- live! in my town! sweet!) with Steven and BFF and BFF's hubby. I had imbibed quite a bit that night, plus taken a Z, so I was floating! It was perfect tho- just enuf to where I was having a great time with no inhibtions to keep me off the dance floor! BFF and I danced it up, I collected cups off the floor and turned them in for the cash to pay for our drinks, and Steven came along which was awesome and unexpected. So, started out being a great night, but then....
My purse got snatched by some beotch and I had to shove my way thru the crowd until I spotted the purse and ran up and grabbed it out of her hand before she even knew what hit her. I should have called the cops on her ass- or the bouncer- or at least told her off! But I wasnt in the frame of mind for rational thought or confrontation, so I was just glad to get the purse back.
So, situation #1 avoided, I assumed I was in the clear, but nooooo....
I had to keep Steven (new name- Silver Fox!) from getting in two fights. One, with the friend of the beotch from my softball team; and two, some fat redneck who was up in our faces for no apparent reason.
After the concert we went to the bars and I was happy and excited to see my friend Blondie and her Big Busted friend and some other peeps out! So we were just chilling with them having a good time. Spotted ex-friends JP and LK and completely ignored them cuz I wasnt in the mood to deal. Then, the softball BEOTCH had to ruin it all. She made eye contact with me (which I had been trying to avoid- damn it!) and made her come over into the quiet corner to talk to her. She got up on her uppity high horse and basically lextured me about my attitude on the field. Really who cares? That was over months ago but she just had to bring it up, make a big deal out of it just to proove what she believes to be right, and ruin my night. Looking back on it now I wish I had told her off, but like I said, I wasnt in the mood for confrontation so I just let it go.
But, being a senstive person, it did bother me. And Steven could see that I was upset so he (in a drunken haze) went and confronted her. He told her he had watched a few games and at least i tried hard, and he didnt see her try at all, and he told her that she should be supporting her teammate instead of discouraging her, etc etc etc. Go Steven! Way to defend me! He even said "dont talk to MY GIRL like that!" I was surprised and very glad to hear him refer to me in that way and to see the way he instantly got pissed when he found out someone was upsetting me. Maybe this is the way he shows he cares?! So because it really was sweet, I wasnt pissed that he tried to start a fight, in fact I wanted to punch that mouthy bitch myself!!! The scarey part was, he almost fought with an arm-wrestling champion, so even tho Steven is big I really didnt want o see him get his ass kicked and get 86'd out of another bar, so I stood in front of him and pushed him away and finally got him to leave out the back door...
So i thought the situation was difused but he went around to the front door and stood there eyeballing the guy getting him to come outside. Convinced...or cajoled...or physically forced him out of there. But then as we were getting our bikes some fat drunk redneck fucker came up and literally stood in our way mouthing off to Steven saying he was eyeballing him. We tried to explain that it wasnt him we were looking at, and he wasnt even involved in the situation, but he didnt listen. By this point I was pissed! I started yelling at the guy we are just trying to leave get out of our way and let us leave!!! He FINALLY backed off, altho i dont know if it was me yelling or Steven threatening to call the cops or both but finally we were on our bikes and out of there. Steven started dialing the cops from my phone but I took it away and hung it up- I knew it wouldnt do any good and I just didnt want to deal with anymore drama or these people- I just wanted out of there. The ride home felt very long thats for sure.
So of course the almost-fighting isnt good but it did show me that he cares and will be there in an instant to defend me- even if it means getting punched out by an arm wrestling champ!
Things have actually been going really good lately. The drama has settled significantly now that we've passed the critical 3-month mark (a first for me in a while!) and we've settled into a routine. Ive come to terms with the fact that i cant rush him into anything and I think now he feels more comfortable now that he doesnt feel pressured. This could drive me batty- I mean I do hate the "non-relationship" but for all intents and purposes we are BF/GF, he doesnt really say it in that direct way yet. But we act like it and everyone knows we are together. So, really Im okay with it, for now. My patience wont last forever but I am a very patient person. And, I can count on people (mainly Lisa) to point out the obvious to me to give him that little extra nudge he needs to realize how awesome I am and make this official....
Last week there was a Bday party out at their place but it was on a Thursday night (WTF?!) so I couldnt stay late. Apparently after I left, Lisa and another friend gave him a lecture about him not saying bye to me when I left and other things pertaining to how he treats me. Altho I am glad to have someone point out these things to him cuz I know hes oblivious sometimes, I dont think they should be so hard on him. hes a good guy with a good heart and I believe he does care about me, hes just young and doesnt have it all figured out yet.
Lisa told me that she told him that I care about him a lot and that he needs to recognize that. She told him that I am very patient with him and that I am waiting for him. He apparently said he cares about me too and thinks Im the coolest girl ever! I just think hes scared. Hes scared to take it to the next step. hes scared to make an official commitment. he scared to open up his heart again. I just wish he knew...I am one of the best people to open up to. If he gives me his heart I wont ever squash it...I need to figure out a way to proove that to him :)
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